Monday, September 17, 2007
Monday, 17 September
today woke up at 5.30pm. saw marcus, hq, zee & blar blar blar messages. so i called marcus. he dont sound happy, i can feel it somehow! & when i rang him after my meal again, this time, i didnt sound good. hahs im sorry marcus. sometimes i sleep too much, i just feel annoyed. dont ask me why, i dont know either. (:
then the next half evening, am glued to the television programmes. that's about it.
why do human beings have feelings? it's amazing how humans react to something someone said that will actually affect you the whole entire day.
you always asked: "where are you?", "who are you with?", "what are you doing there?", "what time you going home?" or "who i talking to?", "why you prefer to talk to him than me?", "why cant you spend some time with me?", "why.." ... why why why.
you always looking out for me. & i thought you would do exactly the same without me having to ask! & yes, you disappoint me. when it's my turn to ask you similar questions, you too answered, "my friend." then i had difficulties trying to figure out what to reply or react. i was affected. i thought you wouldnt upset me with those things i did to you. & from there, i knew you were in my shoes. im just experiencing the pain you felt when i was out with other friends. if you cant handle that date with her, do not expect me to know how.
when you were over my place,
and your guy friend/s called,
guyfriend: "where you?"
you: "pasir ris."
guyfriend: "who you with? what for?"
you: "with kristy/her, at her place."
...
when your girl friend/s called
girlfriend: "where you?"
you: "at pasir ris."
girlfriend: "what for?"
you: "eating."
....
you didnt know i would take this to heart, did you? yes, i did. somehow my heart feels sour and i just had to pretend that you just merely told her that cause before she rang you i were having my lunch.
you were out with her and i only got to know about it when both of you were bout to go home. so why do you still wanna expect so much from me then? i didnt want you to have to purposely message me in the night to let me know you are awake & actually messaging her. i didnt need you to remind me how much you care for me by purposely always sending the wrong text to me which is by right for your friends. i knew all the while you care. i feel it ok. im no fool to actually think you dont bother me.
you did so much yet you destroyed it all. you convinced me that you will not do the exact thing i did to you. you told me you care about me, my feelings. & you do silly things to make me wanna question you, make me upset, make me jealous, trying so hard to get my attention. you win. you got my attention & not only that, im pissed.
when i questioned you over your date, you would go like, "im just going out with my colleague...i didnt cheat on you whatsoever...never lie to you...what about you going out with...you also never think of how i feel...for so long i first time go out with my colleague you say you...you're contradicting yourself...you say i dont believe you but when i say she's just my friend you also like that...i dont go out with them and wait for you to ask me out...you also go find your friends what...it's really up to you."
yea i did explain things to you the way you are doing to me now. i know i have no right to say good things about myself now. you did do comparison too. is it so hard for you to understand?
[i feel terrible full stop] - that's all i mean, nothing more nothing less. it's just my feelings that affected me, not you. you need not make it sound so serious at all.
and only now that i know he was out with her yesterday at east coast! wtf.
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*previous post*
Saturday, 8 September
was out with hq, watched Naraka 19 @ marina sq. it's a four stars rated film. and guess what? it's a waste of money to catch that show. shopped a bit and realize there's nothing for me to buy. wth..
Sunday, 9 September
a day out to town. shopped around and finally found things to buy. very broke. all thanks to my
boss, and i purchased some clothes online. hais. if you wish to donate some money, do let me know ok. hahs.
*previous post*
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more posts.
Thursday, 13 September
after exams already! rest the whole day i think. i forgot what did i do that day. hahs =D
Friday, 14 September
i went out for dinner with marcus at bedok 85. 3 dishes. full enough to make us complain. then went to the park nearby my place to do some catching up. hahs and on our way to my block, we saw a snail. i asked if it was alive, he replied yes. and we crouched down to take a better view of it. then we discussed about it's eyes which eyeballs can actually turn 360 degree. marcus dont believe me so we took a closer look.
then something brushed my left arm so i turned, and screamed. because we squatted there for sometime already, so the fascinated cat came over to take a look as well. my scream startled marcus and the cat. hahs he was like " WHAT THE ... "
the cat: "what's so interesting about the stupid snail?"
and after that the cat can still sit around licking its' paw.
eewwww! i hate cats to come near me! the incident still tickles me.
Saturday, 15 September
work from 5 to 9pm. and went home after that. hahs boring day.
Sunday, 16 September
station, a few decide where to go and not much shows to catch, so we took a train towards the East. we alighted at working too. from 12 to 9pm. sold 6 mp3s!! close to $900 sales. first time so happy with my performance. hahs at about 8pm, jack asked me to company him smoke. zee and her friend tagged along. then he kept pushing me to her. hahs wth.. but still not bad lahs. can relax a bit there. the weather was good, raining. first time sat outside with them and chat. fun though.
then after work zee, ken and i have dinner 2gether at sakae sushi. ken's treat! after that we coulnt think of a place to go.. not much shows either so we took a train towards East. at bugis station, some indians board the train. zee dont like their odor so we alighted at aljunied. and so we boarded the next train, guess what! another group of ah neh.. then we alighted and walked to the front and board the next. hahs
later we had starbucks coffee @ simei. and they're doing closing already. we walked towards the bus 12 bus stop which was a distance away, took 12 and alighted @ loyang. and took a cab to airport! hahs.. was nice sitting around there, cos the place's quiet and we browsed through singapore brochure. after which zee took a puff and we sat around the entrance playing with those "cookies". hahs lame.. we took a cab back after a drink. was about 4.30am by then. chatted a bit over the phone and zzz.
❤papayaQueen
KristyHadLeftASweetEntry@ 10:23:00 PM.
